Choices
by quinnofhearts
Summary: Megan is a emotionally disturbed girl, nobody is really there for her in her life leading her to cling to something, someone. After long years of being abused by her father fiscally and emotionally and only emotionally abused by her mother she doesn't see anything wrong in the jokers outburst as she tries to get closer to him. Will she change her ways and see she worth more or stay
1. Alleyway of sin

**Hey so this is an OC and Joker fic, I am trying to stay true to his character from Batman Dark Knight but I know it may not be right on so sorry. Anyways, I am awful at spelling and grammar and all that stuff so sorry about any errors. ENJOY!**

**P.S: I OWN NOTHING (but my OC) **

_**Summery- Megan is a emotionally disturbed girl, nobody is really there for her in her life leading her to cling to something, someone (The Joker X) After long years of being abused by her father fiscally and emotionally and only emotionally abused by her mother she doesn't see anything wrong in the jokers outburst as she tries to get closer to him. Will she change her ways and see she worth more than being slapped around or go follow him down the rabbit hole?**_

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Walking home from work wasn't the best idea in Gotham but what choice do I have? My car broke down last week and none of the busses run this late. I pull up my hood of my jacket as I feel rain begin. Hearing a few feet moving from an alleyway I was passing by I pick up my pace not wanting a run in with anyone.

Right before I could pass the alleyway entice a man stops me.

"Hey girl" he walked very close to me.

I stumbled back catching myself.

"Can I help you?" I choke out.

"Yeah you can help me out" he laughs to his friend and makes a dirty gestured to his male parts.

I look away from the man horrified.

"Sorry no" I try to walk pass the two men but they didn't let me pass.

"Oh come on where you going?" Ask the second man.

Both men were skinny looked every addict to many things faces very pale and sickly.

"Go away!" I demand.

They both laugh at my act of bravery. Again I try to pass them this time one stood in front and the other behind.

"Come on I wanna show ya something" the first man told me.

"No, please I just want to go home" I told him not begged.

"I'll take you home baby" the second men lusted in my ear.

I squirm as his body was much too close to mine. My heart races scared to death of what these two men might do.

"Just get out of my way!" My voice is shaky.

I look over my shoulder trying to see if there was anyone around who might save me.

"Come here!" The second men said.

He grabbed my arm trying to hold me closer to him.

"NO!" I shouted and pushed him away.

"Hey don't be a bitch to my buddy girl, put out" the first men said.

Then he pushed me on to the alleyway floor I drop my bag. I move backwards for a moment then raise to my feet.

"Yeah girly put out" the second men followed my movements pulling at his belt.

Quickly I ran in to the alleyway more seeing no other option since the two men were blocking escape. My breath was heavy my heart was on fire.

"Hey got get her!" Yelled one of the men to the other.

Oh god I don't know my way around here and they sure as hell do. I heard the man's foot steps behind me not to far, I sharply turn a corner and see I'm at a dead end, quickly I duck beside a dumpster praying the lack of light hinds me. Feeling around I find a wooden beam good enough to beat someone with. The man passes me then stops dead in his tracks.

"Where'd ya go girly?" He laughs.

I try desperately to not breathe. He looks around and grabs a few things that could hind someone coming up empty he continues. I wait until his back is to me then I quietly jump out and slam the piece of wood hard on his spine bringing him to the floor. Again and again I hit him till the wood brakes in two.

I throw the remaining wood away and catch my breath sweeping my hair out of my face.

"You bitch!" Yells the other man as he steps in view of his beaten bloody buddy.

Crap I just tossed my only weapon out of my hand so I could breathe; it's not time to breathe yet there still him left! I cruse myself and know it's only a brick wall behind me nowhere to run. The man rushes me taking me to the ground I tried to hit him back tried to push him off but his body weight over powers mine. He grabs me and pulls me to the wall.

I cry out as his hands leave bruises everywhere he touches me.

"Stop please stop!" I cry out.

He just slaps me in the face shutting me up for a moment. I sob and continue to fight him harshly he grabs my hands with one of his and holds them over my head. I hear his belt come undone followed by his pants unbutton and unzip. Dear god please stop him please! I pray.

Tears roll down my cheek as the pig kisses my neck. I found no pleasure in this just pure pain and sorrow. Before anything went further the man gasps chocking on his own blood. I slid down the wall as the man who tried to take me was thrown to the other side of the alley.

I look up to my savior; the man was tall about six foot something pale from what I could see the moon light left basically everything to the imagination. With harsh hands he drags my up the wall pinning me by my throat with his hand. I squeak in fear. I blink many times trying to keep the water from ruining my vision.

I haven't notice till now the slight rain has turned in to a full of shower. His hand loosened my neck.

"Did you do that?" He asks pointing to the man who laid beaten on the floor.

I nod my head and faintly and say "yes"

He go's in to a fit of laughter slapping his knees. After long moment he stops laughing and tenses his stance.

"Little girls shouldn'T be out this late" he wagged his gloved index finger to me.

"No I shouldn't" I agree.

"You might find some trouble waiting for you around the corner" he smirked.

His face was still hidden as the shadows covered him.

"I did" I say softly my big eye widened like a child's.

He seemed confused by me.

"What happens to pretty girls who are out when the monsters are?" He purrs playing with me waiting for me to answer.

I took a moment to answer he wanted one I knew it he didn't want me to beg or ask what he wanted he wanted my answer so I gave it.

"They become ugly girls" my voice was low but I was confident in what I said.

This stranger who had me by the throat earlier should have scared me more however; I saw reasoning in him he wasn't going to do anything unless I made him.

"You ARE A BEAUTY!" he shouts. "You've got the blonde hair, blue eyes AND HELL WHAT A BODY!" He said talking with his hands. "Something as pretty as you shouldn't be ruined... Not yet" he mumbles the last bit. "Come on little girl before any one ssscarss your pretty face" he says holding his body close to mine using his gloved hands to trance a long smile to my cheeks.

I shiver at his touch. I nod and he leads me out of the alleyway. As we pass the two men who lay on the floor I see what has become of them. The one who tried to force himself on my laid on the ground with a long piece of wood sticking out of the back of his neck surround by his own blood.

My body went cold I've never seen a dead body before; I didn't know what to feel what to think. Then I truly didn't know what to do when I saw the man I was beating head was open showing his smashed brains on the floor. I killed him I really did. I don't feel bad for the men they were going to rape me but, but I feel something and I'm not sure what.

The man who saved me huffed and grabbed my hand pulling me alongside him obviously board with the sight of those men. I quicken my steps to keep up with his long strides. Finally we found ourselves out of the alley I grab my bag off the floor where I had dropped it then continue to follow the man.

"Thank you" I break the silence between me and the stranger.

He seemed indifferent to my thanks.

"Oh don't mention it" he said sarcastically.

After another moment of complete quiet he spoke.

"What-CHAss name blondie?" He spoke oddly.

"Megan" I try to talk as thou I wasn't scared as if I wasn't nearly rape.

I want badly to cry but I kept myself strong In front of this new friend.

"Little Meg" he mocks me.

"And yours?" I ask ignoring his insult.

"A-ah no, no" he says with a skip in his step.

"I told you mind" I protest.

"The way of the world" he talked with amazement in his voice. "It will take and never give"

I sigh. I couldn't deny his logic. As I look to the ground my feet following behind his it dawns on me where are we going?

"Where are we going?" I ask.

"Huh-" he turns to look at me. "To your home, isn't that where you said you wanted to go?" He answered like a fact.

"Yes" I nod. "Homes right" I say pointing at the soon turn.

He nodded and turned right.

"Sooooooooooo meG! Why ouT so laTe?" He asks with his unique way of making every word fun.

I went to answer then cut myself off before I did.

"Huh, I'll answer after you tell me what you're doing out so late" I tell him.

He laughed "You catch on fast little Meg!" He said excited. "It's why I like you" he hissed.

I smile and wait for him to answer after a moment I grown inpatient.

"So?" I ask waiting.

"...I lookin for something... INTERESTING, FUN!" He said waving his hands explaining his enthusiasm.

I nod. He so full of life it's a joy to be around.

"Did you find it?" I ask. He turns fast on his heels I couldn't stop my step fast enough and walk straight in to him I look up his hands tightened on my shoulders he grin was large.

"Oh Meg, yesss, yes I did" his words hissed.

One of his hands traveled up to crease my cheek. He finally faced me since we've stepped in to a lighten street and with the light I saw his face. Handsome I would defiantly say with pricing toxic green eyes but what laid on top of his natural beauty scared me. A painted white face running off from the rain with black eyes from his brow to his cheek bone and painted scarlet lips that went to his cheeks the red laid on top of a scar the much resemble a smile.

knots twisted in my stomach. I didn't move from his embrace though.

"I-I think I no-know who you are" I studier.

The joker pop in my head he has been in the news lately for robbery a few days ago he was on the news it was the first time I saw his face.

"OOOh... Do ya know" he hissed like a snake. "Who am I?" He said fast his words nearly blended.

"You're..." It took me a moment to continue he seemed eager and I was trying to swallow my fear. "...The Joker" I breathe out with jagged breaths.

His head tilted to the side obviously thinking his hands were squeezing my arms tight I wanna to cry out from the pain instead I kept my cries inside but they burn my throat trying to escape. Quickly his body jumps backs from him as he goes's in to a Hysterical fit of laughing, almost doubling over.

"Ah-wow-ha-ha-hehe!"

I stood still keeping my face unaffected by his strangeness, very much on the inside though I was scared to death of him. He regains his composure standing straight and waves me to follow him so I did.

"Left" I say lowly giving him Direction to my home.

He continued the way I told him not making another sound. Why is he here, can't I get a break tonight? Finally we made it to my house; I wanna to cry out 'thank the lord!' But didn't this stranger, the joker still might do something.

"Here we are" I smile walking on the first of three steps to my one story fully bricked house.

He stood right in front of me with a sideways smile as our height was still nowhere close to meeting. He took one step forward I took one back this game continued in unison till my back found my front door. He still smiled devilishly as he took a step forward and I had nowhere to go so finally as he wanted so many steps before our body's are pinned together.

"You are pretty" he purred.

His gloved hand pulled my hair from the messy lose bun it was in before, he straightens my wet strands, side sweep over my right shoulder going slightly passed my breasted. My heart quickened I swear you can hear it, my breath short I tried to not gasp for air and my body burning for him to be closer.

"Let me see a smile" he commanded.

I could hear the victory in his voice he knows he's bring me want for him and he loves it. My lips twirl in to the smile he commanded from me it felt natural perhaps I have been wanting to smile for awhile now.

"Ah-awe oh what a pretty girl" he cooed mockingly.

One of his hands runs down my jaw line finding my chin picking it up with his index finger. The rubber of his gloves felt cold on my face making me want to shiver. I held my smile as I see his face; it is still shadowed by the lack of light.

"What a pretty smile" his voice went dark demented.

I drop my smile seeing in to his eyes he looked wild about ready to snap. I tighten scared of what this man might do next. How have I been so stupid to let him so close to me. I tried to rip my face away from his never ending gaze but he wouldn't let me.

With one hand he held my chin and my jaw in his hand not letting my gaze leave his. He tightened making me cry out in pain.

"Sh-shhh" He hushed me. "Where'd that smile go?" he roared in my ear. "Let's see a smile" his voice burned.

I tried to fake one but his fingers dug in to my skin before I could making me cry out again.

"Stop" I mustered out. "You're hurting me"

He licked his lips shaking his head to get his wet hair out of his face.

"Meg, little Meg" he spoke in breaths. "Why so serious?" he smacked his lips as he asked.

I tremble then I stood very still eyes widened as I felt metal in my mouth. A small blade he held there as his other hand still held my neck now bruising me.

"Let'ssss make a SMILE on that pretty face MEG!" he hissed and yelled some words.

I searched his eyes for any reasoning any compassion. He seemed lost somewhere else licking the inside on his cheeks I'm guessing feeling his own scars. I take a deep breath and smile to him it wasn't big and it looked very shy of a smile but it still was a smile.

He took the blade out of my mouth and I struggled to hold that smile. His hand that was once almost choking me now rubs my neck with the back of his hand. A smile that's all he wanted. We stood there for a long time like this.

"I want to go to bed" I tell him softly.

He tilted his head then nodded and released me from his grasp. He steps back and I quickly find my keys in my bag as I did I felt his eyes on me. I unlock the door and turn to him.

"Goodnight" I tell him.

He didn't reply just stood there very close. His eyes looked sad and full of many emotions it softened my idea of him quickly. This man needs help needs compassion, obviously he's been hurt. I sigh and show some compassion.

"I like your smile" I say reaching my hands to the ends of his lips tracing his scars till they ended. "Thank you for tonight"

And with not more than a second I turned in my house and shut the door locking it. I quietly walk through my house not wanting to wake my dad or mom till I finally enter my room, clicking on the light I kick off my shoes and throw my bag across my room in a fit of anger. I still didn't cry though I've made enough noise as it is throwing my bag. I tore off my pants then my plain mans t-shirt I shake my hair as water drips out. Slipping out of the rest of my underclothing I grab my bathrobe and lay down in my bed. I stare up at my glowing stars finally letting some thoughts come in my head.

I nearly got-got raped to night by a bunch of junkies, I killed one of the said junkies. I didn't know I had that in me, should I feel bad that man had a life, a life of hurting other girls. I don't feel bad for either one of those pigs they had it coming. That man, the Joker I had trusted him too much, why?

He robes and hurts people yeah that's bad but he also killed that pig, he saved me. He's misunderstood, and obviously needs help, I know he's crazy because of how he turned on me after saving me but how his brain thinks isn't his fault. Men snap crazy or not men hurt girls every once in a while if the girls admit it or not, I can't hold everything against him. He saved me.

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**Please review tell me what ya think! REVIEW, REVIEW!**


	2. Chaos

**AGAIN SORRY ABOUT ANY ERRORS! ENJOY AND REVIEW! (BTW bad words in this chapter sorry) **

**One Week Later…**

"I'm out of here" I say letting the closing cook know.

"Alright see you tomorrow Meg" Mike says.

I walk out of the back leaving the mop there for Mike and quickly changed in the bathroom in to a pair of black leggings and put on my favorite over baggie red sweater on, I got at Forever 21 the men side, then my black beanie and knock off Ugg boots. I tightly roll my stained Dinner dress and tan stockings in my bag with my slip on white keds. As I walk out of the girl's bathroom I lock it and throw the keys on the counter. I walk out of that diner wishing I had my car or enough money for cab fair but I don't and no one's gonna help me out so whatever. I lived about a little over an hour away if I was walking only like ten minutes if were driving at my normal high speed.

I really need to fix my car. After awhile of walking on the streets of Gotham keeping my head down as back alleyway deals were made and addicts were traded. Guess people are less scared of Batman this week normal they quiver in their little criminal boots which made it more comfortable for me to walk home but not to night. Then I stop dead in my tracks, I turn my head facing the same back alley that I killed that man, that I meet the Joker.

Some part of me wanted to walk down there to see if he'd be there waiting to save me again. I shake my head that's ridicules thought. I had no clue why I had become so obsessed with the idea of him it's all that I ever thought about. I shake my head and continue walking to my house.

I hummed along to a song in my head trying to pass the time thought about how tomorrow gonna be a good day how school tomorrow is going to be enjoyable how I'll stop thinking of the stranger, Joker to come in to my life and changed it tare it down and save me. I lied to myself with all these thoughts I know it. I halted when I heard footsteps behind me I was scared as I felt a pair of eyes burning, staring at me. I know I have been calling myself stupid and childish for wishing to see him but I really do hope it's him because if it's not that means it's someone else and the last time I had a run in with someone of the streets things were awful.

I turn slowly to see the street light held no one in view, continue to look for the owner of the footsteps I heard but found no one. I just continue to walk faster I just want to be safe in my room. With no more interruptions I made it to my street looking at my house seeing there were still lights on. This night couldn't get worse.

I walk in to my house hoping they don't hear me enter; slowly I try to drift in my room passing the living room.

"Hey!" my drunken father calls to me.

I sigh and turn I have been caught.

"Where've you been?" he asks.

His face red and sweaty and a beer in his hand.

"Work" I tell him.

I don't want to deal with him tonight, I just wanna go to sleep I have school soon.

"Work" he snorted. "Why the hell you out so late?"

"Work" I answer again wrinkling my forehead in annoyance.

"Get out of here you stupid bitch" he mumbles plopping down on his old recliner.

I roll my eyes now that he's not looking at me. I start to walk off than his raspy voice yells for me again.

"What?!" I'm pissed now.

"Hey don't you take that tone with me!" he sternly said pointing his finger at me. "You left a fucking mess last night, your mother spent all morning cleaning it"

"Sorry" I huff.

"Don't do it again you make a mess you clean it up, stupid girl"

"Yes!"

"Stop with the tone or I slap it out of you!"

"Okay sorry" I say softly.

I leave the room and walk in my room quietly shutting my door behind me. Why do I even come home, why bother? I shake away all my bad thoughts leaving them for another night; I just can't deal right now. I start to get ready for bed taking a shower, pulling my hair up and fixing my covers.

Before I lay down I reach in my bag to pull out my apron taking the twenty-two bucks I earned tonight in tips out I open my closet and pull out a shoe box I had laying on the floor. Opening it my heart drops in my stomach and my face turns red most all the money I had in the box is gone.

"Just fuck" I hit my fist on the wall.

I throw my head back breathing heavy trying to control my anger. I wanted to cry from all the burning rage inside on me. I could kill him, I really could all I have to do is grab a knife and stab him it's easy just walk up to him and put it to his throat one hand movement and all my rage could be satisfied. I'm going to murder my father if I don't get out of this house.

I quickly got up a shoved my window open crawling out I hit the thin air in front of me imaging my father bloody body in front of me. I exit through the gate and sit in front of my house on the curb of the street. I tried so hard to save that money and he took it because my work to him means nothing. I bring my knees to my chest holding them tight with my arms trying to stay warm.

Smartest person ever I'm outside in freezing weather in pair of pink short shorts some modest people may mistake for boy shorts underwear and tight white spaghetti strapped shirt with a pink over shirt matching the shorts barefoot. I close my eyes laying my head on my knees wishing all this anger, sorrow just in general all these feelings would go away.

"Lookie, lookie what have we got here" His voice sounds like a child playing around.

I knew without looking up who it was, Joker. He had made an everlasting impression upon me I know even if I forgot everything I would remember him. I look up to him I knew it was properly the best idea was to smile but I couldn't, I am not happy.

"Hi" It was dull and didn't at all match the excitement in his voice.

I still am curled in to myself looking for some warmth. He sits down next to me with a frown. His long boney farm was well suiting is the moon light however, the painted face still made me shiver. I didn't show it though.

"WhaT's wrong life's-a got ya down?" he asks with a mocking sympathetic tone.

I ignore his mocking tone and answer as if he really asked wanting my answer.

"I hate my life" I turn to him he look unaffected by my words.

I just look back down fiddling with my fingers.

"I go to school all day with teachers who really don't care than work being ever ass's waitress and come home to what? A bigger ass of a dad and an addict mom. What's life, what's the point of it? Because if this is living I really don't understand"

"You see-a that's what I have been tryin ta say" he drags his word as he breaths out. "If ya live the way they-a tell ya to ya will always come out empty handed" he licked his lips and smacked the together before continuing. "But ya seeeee" he shakes his head not looking let's say all there. "If ya change it change the ruleS they-a won'T know what ta do and then it sets in" His smile was long with fire burning in his eyes. "Chaos!" his body jumps at the word longing for it.

"How do I change the rules? What Rules?"

"Oh-ah-ya-see" he held up his hand slowing me down. "Of order, this sense that-a people are more than just raved dogs looking for a bite" he spoke as if the whole idea of good people was crazy. He continued to talk with his hands. "Cuz people" he raised an eyebrow to me, his voice husky. "Are just looking for a bite" I remember that tone it freighted me once before.

I couldn't deny what he said though; I have never met someone who didn't want something from me.

"Your right" I tell him.

"Ah-ha-ha-eh" he laughed quietly.

"What's so funny?" I ask.

I wish I saw that much humor in the world I might actually be happy once and a while.

"Well ya see dalin" he soft slowly mocking my understanding skills. "Ya-your" he was still chuckling. "The first person to agree with me who-um didn't completely agree just for the pure benefit of IT"

"Do you agree for the benefit or just knowing its true?" I ask him.

He seemed to think my question was too personal I could tell on his face. I can guess not many people if any looked pass his abnormal demeanor to get to know him or ask his reasoning for anything.

"I mean do you believe in the end its true no one looks out for anyone just looks for a bite because you gain whatever you want in that view without regret or do you know it's true and you just living?" I ask my question more complex.

"I believe in chaosss because chaos is the only true enD, chaos will never fail ya, can't fight it" he seemed angry and passionate but as he spoke it's like he was preaching out of the good book. "Meaning of the world isssssss…. chaosssss!" he smacked his hands together as he hissed 'chaos'.

I jump startled by his clap.

"Do you still believe in hope?" I wanted to know.

"Hope" he said the word like it was a joke. "Hope true meaning ya-see-here is-a liesss"

I look down feeling very girlish. "I hoped I would see you again" I admitted softly not daring to look at him.

He didn't say another word nor did I. we both sat there quiet as mice. After what I think is to be an hour I tire of the silence. Perhaps small talk would be better than our beliefs and things as such.

"How old are you?" I ask looking to him.

His face was still for all of the silence but as I asked his eyes moved looking around the street than to me. His grin devilish.

"Ya sure-a like ta know a lot about a-ya person don't-cha?"

"Well come on" I ask bumping him a bit on the middle of his arm with my shoulder. "Tell me"

He sighed shaking his head. "How old are you, dearrrrrry?"

"Seventeen" I sigh. "And now you're not gonna tell me how old you are"

"Ahhh ya see sweetHEART, you are righT" he laughed for a moment.

I shake my head. Yeah I guessed.

"Alright than" I say.

I wrap my arms around my skinny legs more trying to keep the air off of them. I shiver as the air nips at my neck. I see him look at me confused.

"So I'm guessing since you won't tell me your age you're not gonna tell me you name, are ya?"

He laughed for a moment. "Ah-ha-ha, no, no nooo"

"Well can I call you Jay?" I ask.

Joker was his crime name and it felt not right to call him that. To me his not a criminal he's a person I want to know better.

"Jay? Hmmm, I-a yeah-a I like JaYY"

I smile to him glad I found something I could call him besides Joker. His eyes brightened to me filling the black color with a toxic green. What made him so happy? I careful managed to wiggle my body closer to his without drawing his attention.

The body heat the came off of him felt so warm like a fire, my legs were so white my blue veins very visible because of the cold I have endured. Again silence took over and we sat quiet enjoying each other's company. I soaked in his smell cigarettes and gunpowder, I loved his sent abnormal as it is. My eyes were so heavy with the want of sleep but I denied I want him over the need of sleep no I need him over sleep.

I yawn in to my hands finding his body to lean mine on, by this point I no longer care if I was too close to him I couldn't keep myself up any more. Resting my head on his shoulders it felt like heaven, just him being here comforts me more then I have ever been in my life. After a second I felt his hands shaky move around my shoulders pushing me in to him more. I smile and snuggle in to his chest.

Finally something made since, he made since. My eyes grow heavier I tried my hardest not to fall asleep on his chest. Every once and a while I went in and out of sleep.

"You see it" his words hissed in my ear. "The world, was-a…" his voice trails off as black filled my vision.

"…You and me, Meggg...yyy"

"Huh?" I try to speck.

"Shh-hush-shh" he whispers me.

Finally I felt the warmth I was so in need of earlier and the sleep finally won.

The light found my eyes waking me from my deep sleep. I rub my eyes turning in my bed to see my clock '10:26' I defiantly over slept and school has been going on for a long while. I shrug it off and get out of bed nothing I can do now. As I exited my bed I saw a Joker card sitting on my nightstand grabbing it I read what was written on it.

'_Alleyway tonighT. –J' _

I smile and put the card in my scrapbook my grandmother gave me. I started to get dressed for the day making sure to groom myself perfectly. Talking an hour in the shower deep conditioning my hair and shaving till I was silky smooth I finally stepped out wrapping myself in the bathrobe. I didn't bother to blow dry or do my makeup, all my stuff is crap.

I needed better makeup actually makeup more than cheap foundation and powder followed with cheep mascara. I didn't want to look like a girl who had no clue how to do her makeup. Looking around I walk out of my bathroom to my mom's room no one seemed to be in it I walked in the bathroom grabbing out all her makeup. My mom was the best at makeup she had so much it was crazy all from Mac and other name brand places, whatever she didn't spend of drugs she spent on her makeup. I knew all her tricks that were the only way we ever bounded here and there.

Pulling out her big case I started doing my makeup, it was perfect her skin was as fair as mine. After a good forty minutes my eyes were covered with white eye shadow on my lid then a dark grey on my cresses following down under my eyes and a heavy line of black wet eyeliner making a small cat eye, my lips a ruby red and cheeks contour and flushed pink. By the time I was ready to curl my hair it was dry I curled it perfectly parting it to the right. After I was done I put back everything where I found it not leaving any advice I was here. Then rush to my closet knowing I need to wear my outfit of outfits! Putting it on, I look in the mirror feeling like the hottest woman ever.

Black cotton high wasted pelted mini skirt, with a white sheer button up shirt stopping at my collar bone with a laced collar, tucked perfectly in my skirt, on top of the button up was a grey cardigan with two pockets low underneath my breasts, the cardigan stop where the skirt and shirt met, then I put on a black long fabric coat leaving it un buttoned, the back of the coat was silt open, I also wore classic black see-through stockings that attached with garters to add to my sexy feel. You can't see the garters unless my skirt was to blow up a little, or I sit down or I wanted you to. And one top of the stockings were over the knee dark grey socks and a pair of six inch lace up ankle boots. I look hot.

As I saw myself in the mirror, for once I felt beautiful.

I'm a bombshell he's gonna love it. I touch my lips thinking of his ruby red ones, I darkened my eyes more than normal to add to the hollow look I want much to look perfect next to him. I guess that's silly I tried matching my makeup with what I guess he uses oil face paint. I think I love him. Yeah I love him.

I wasted hours till I finally started to walk down to the alleyway I knew he meant. I ditched work and school today to see him and I could care less, I normally ditch school but I have never blow off work unless I was beaten and bleeding on the bathroom floor. After twenty minutes of walk in these heels I wanted to through them off but it's all for the sex appeal I remind myself. I laugh realizing I have never looked this good in front of him the first time we meant I was in yesterdays makeup half sobbed off a man's shirt and over sized jackets, and my hair was ratted and wet in a ponytail, yesterday night I had no makeup on hair pulled in a wet bun in .

Now I am done up like a doll a sexy doll. I finally came to the alleyway entice I took short steps minding were I was walking not waiting to trip over anything. Walking down the alleyway for a bit it took longer to get to the dead end not running, before I turned the corner to the dead end I took a dead breath and fixed any fly away hairs.

"Boss, boss please I'm-I'm sorry" screamed a man.

I stopped dead in my tracks what if it's not him then I'm dead I look way to good to be walking down alleyways. I peek my head out seeing Jay kick the man's ass literally. The Man fell to the ground begging.

"Ah-wow-oh-oh-ha-ah-ha-he-he-wow-oh!" Joker laughed slashing the man's throat.

I gasp stepping back hitting something on the ground causing noise. I cursed myself shutting my eyes tight. He laughs stopped his footsteps were light on the ground.

"Come out come out wherever ya are!" he shouted excited.

I couldn't move it scared me to see him just end a life.

"Ah-ha-wow-ha!" he jumps in front of me pinning me to the wall with the knife to my throat.

"Joker!" I squirm.

**Okay what do ya think Please REVIEW cuz I have no clue if I'm doing this story right:-/ **


	3. Bruises, Bites, Love, Scars, & Pleasure

**I JUST WANNA SAY THANKS TO,**

**Leslie Lili,**

**Lilies and Bobcats,**

**&amp; AsokaECHoof21**

**For reviewing! thank you guy you gave me a well needed confidence boost in my writing and in this story! Thanks! :)**

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"Joker!" I scream.

His laughing stops and the knife loosens. I sigh heavily feeling my heart trying to jump out of my chest.

"Joker" I breathe out heavily.

"Oh doll face sorrYY 'bout that" he says still laughing lightly.

"WHAT THE HELL!" I yell pushing him away from me and grab my neck rubbing it. "What are ya doin?" I ask scowling at him.

He slipped his knife back in to his jacket pocket his movements were smooth as he pulled me from the wall and circle around me like I was his prey.

"Yes"? I ask my tone irritated.

"Glad I wasn'T the onlyyy one to-a dressss uP" he ends as he stands in front of me again.

With that said I look to him seeing what he means, he wearing a musty suite. A pattered shirt and tie, on top a green vest with four buttons however only three are buttoned the one right after the first button is missed, matched with striped purple suit pants and a purple coat and he wears his black rubber gloves. As I trail up from his body to meet his stare his face is almost perfect, his grease painted face look as if the paints were just recently applied.

As I look to him I couldn't help but see the jagged smile from cheek to cheek. While I looked he stood there hunched a bit to look at me in the face his body towers over me a great deal. No words are exchanged as we gaze his toxic green eyes never leaving my face. I lifted my small hand to his face placing my lower palm on his jaw and my fingers rested over the scared smile.

"You look handsome" I tell him softly.

His body shifted under my touch.

"Your-a not so bad lookin yourself, toots" he jokes adding a little gangster to his voice like it was 1940's.

I smirk. He chuckled a bit under his breath.

"Sorry" he muttered still chuckling.

"Huh?-" I was cut off.

The alleyway blued a loud ringing was filling my ears as his white face turned into nothing just abbess.

* * *

Darkness surrounds my eyes giving me tunnel vision I heard dark manically laughing echoing around me. I tried shaking off this medicated feeling but it was no use. Flashes of Jay laughing holding a knife to me span around me, a man tied up gagged and beaten flew through my mind I held my head trying to pin point theses thoughts. Blood splattered on a wall as Jay's voice was roaring sweet nothings in my ear. I could hear myself giggling, a man screaming a hot kiss on my lips and then I saw the blood hit the wall again, snapping sounds filled my mind as did barks of a dog, than a sliver glimmer of a razor and the laughing of Joker again repeating the same word again and again, '_Smile'_

I couldn't put them together couldn't make since of what I was seeing, couldn't put them in the right order to tell a story that would make since; I couldn't understand what I was seeing.

"_Do ya?" he asked whispering in my ear. "Then do it" He commanded, voice sweet and yet a hit of annoyance._

"_I love ya Joker" I heard my own voice slur, giggle._

I hit my head trying to fill in the gasps.

My own blood curdling screams filled my ears as I wonder what the hell what put me in so much pain.

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I tossed and turned till I felt my body jolt and when my eyes opened my tunnel vision was gone. A dark grey room with a ripped up blood soaked mattress that I laid on and old half burnt dresser was all that was in the room, at least all I could see. I pouted having no clue to where I am; it looks like a ruin down building some junkie would squat in. Tear filled my eyes as I felt dry tears on my cheeks. I stood up shaky looking around; behind me was a desk and two doors, both closed.

I went to one door on the right wall to the far left, I turned the knob but nothing happened, it's locked. I sniffle as I limp over to the other door and open it to see a dirty bathroom, stained yellow skin and toilet and a dark mold green and black color rotted the bathtub. I limped in my body sore and aching.

I turned to the mirror, my platinum locks ratted curls crunch and tangled together, my eyes were swollen, red and puffy, my eyeliner and mascara ran down my cheeks leaving black lines and tear marks on my red face with drops of the black makeup on my chest followed with red spots, my ruby lips were smuggled into a long smile smeared to my cheeks.

A flash of the joker commanding a smile came to mind. I shook my head and lost the scene fast.

I finally noticed my shoes and socks were gone, my stockings ripped in many places I pulled at the garter strap it felt very tender, seeing red and brown lines underneath them like the strap was being strapped so many times it started to bruise me, my coat and cardigan gone, my skirt was untouched but in a few places the fabric felt odd covered in something that made it feel rough, then my eyes travel up my white sheer shirt was covered in red patches more than half unbuttoned showing my lacy white bra also smeared red, the right side more.

I looked down to the most painful part of my body, my white shirt was cut up from the back of my wrist to the inside of my elbow the entire sleeve red. As I lifted my right arm to my gaze I could believe what I saw, '_SMILE' _I nearly broke into sob seeing the word cut into my skin and underneath it was, '_-J' _I held myself together knowing it will scar. I look in the mirror more examining my wounds, bruises and new scars.

A hand print was on my neck followed with many bite marks I pulled off my shirt and saw lots of bruises of hand prints on my sides, I turned to look at my back seeing a shallow cut at the bottom of my last rip to the left, and bites on my shoulders, looking down the same as my neck, hand prints covered my thighs along with the bruises of my garter straps.

Beside those blurry memories I had before I woke I don't know anything about last night, but I was for sure about something… I enjoyed myself.

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**so like WOW! this chapter was a bit much for me but i feel the Joker character isn't at all soft or gentle so maybe i pushed it to far IDK but i just kept writing and this is what came to me.**

**If it's to much just say so through PM or REVIEW or if i'm being a wimp also say so please i like to think though i tested boundaries this chapter. hehe:P**

**AND AS I ALWAYS ASK REVIEW! REALLY I NEED THE FEEDBACK I LIVE OFF OF IT X) **


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